I think I’m out of my mind . . .

In one very real sense, everyone in-world is out of their mind. We have consciously transferred our minds, however temporary, into our avatar existence. How we do that and what we become during this period of transference is completely up to us. It is our world and our imagination.

The stark reality is that who I am in-world is pretty much who I am in real life. When I become my avatar, I do not undergo a fundamental change in personality, attitude or belief structure. I become Newbe, but Newbe is really me. The way I treat people in-world is no different than the way I treat people in real life. The biggest difference is that in real life, I cannot start flying on a whim.

Perhaps, in-world I tend to speak a little bit more formally. A little. In real life, I once had someone read a report I had written and comment on my antiquated form of the English language. This, from a gentleman who had learned Latin in grade school! Additionally, I usually don’t call people Miss or Mr in real life. I like the politeness that doing so would bring to the day, but I’m pretty sure I’d see a padded truck nearby should I decide to begin doing so.

But manners of speech are not the same as manners. Polite society, whether in-world or in real life, dictate a certain way of treating each other. Respect for one’s fellow people is fundamental to polite society. One need not agree with the attitudes, actions or beliefs of another, but should respect that others have the right to hold those attitudes and beliefs.

Respect for another’s feelings is critical to a society that wishes to receive respect itself. I won’t go on a rant of global politics. The Lord knows how I feel about that! No, this is about friendships and community in-world, since this blog is about life in-world. Since I first stepped into the vast unknown that is 2ndL, I have been exposed to various communities. I have been accepted into a couple. Two communities come to mind immediately: Caledon and my confidants. I separate my confidants from my friends as there are few in-world that know me better than the very, very small list of friends with whom I feel close enough to discuss true feelings.

Caledon, right from the beginning, accepted me as one of their own. I was treated, and still am treated with politeness. That has not changed. Recent events in my life have made consistent in-world experiences more difficult and elusive, yet I feel that the fundamental politeness of Caledon society has not changed. What has changed is me. Lately, I have felt restless. I have felt that I just don’t belong. I know that there are a few who will say hogwash to this, but I’m sure there are just as many who would say “no, you don’t belong.” They would be right.

They would be right because I have not really been a consistent part of Caledon society for many months. Sure, I pop my head into ISC chat every now and again with my usual irreverent comments, but I have not played a productive part of that society in some time. There have been many changes in Caledon since I’ve been active in-world, and I have missed out on a lot. I seldom hear of events or the day-to-day goings on. There are a great many new citizens that I’ve not met and am quite sure have absolutely no idea who I am, nor would they care. Nor should they care.

Some of my friends have wondered what has happened to me. It has been a combination of many things. First, and most importantly, my real life marital status changed last year. Being newly married, I am happy to spend as much time with my wife as I can. She is my world. She is beautiful, intelligent, exciting and fun. She has given me a renewed zest for life. Of course, she isn’t in-world, so to spend time with her, I cannot spend as much time in-world.

Second, I have gone back to university to work on a degree in business. I still work full-time as an IT manager, so this little venture has take much of my spare time away. I feel that it is worth it as I am getting older in life, but not quite wiser as one would expect to come with age. Sad, that.

Third, I have begun to spend time working on household projects. Sometimes referred to as a honeydo list. ’nuff said.

But enough about me. Caledon always has been and always will be my home. I don’t expect that people will know who I am, nor will they care who I am. After all, I am not a part of their circle. That’s cool. I live with an ethic that has come from a line I once read: “Everyone has my respect from the start. You don’t have to earn it. But God help you if you should do something to lose it.”

That is, perhaps, a bit extreme, but the general sentiment is true for me. Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. Show respect for others and do not lord over them as though you own the world. Give credit where credit is due. They are mottoes to live by.

The last, though, has become particularly pertinent and this is not meant as a specific attack on anyone, but rather has been something that has made me a little sad. My two best friends have recently collaborated on a rather large and beautiful build, which is one of many other builds. It is part of a joint project by Rezzable and Not Possible In Real Life based on a painting by Bosch. Their tower is exquisite, to say the least, and I was very impressed (and a little bit envious!) by their work together. TOGETHER. I’ve heard many people refer to the project as Kheph’s build with little credit given to Miss Laval. Well, that bothers me. It is not Kheph’s build in as much as it is Eladrienne and Kheph’s build. She was the creative force behind the build, but they worked together, 50-50, in turning that creative vision into reality! Their work together is an inspiration in friendship and collaboration.

Teamwork. Friendship. Community. That is what 2ndL inspires and works to bring about. Let’s respect the creative efforts of everyone, not just those we know are talented because of their visibility, but those we SEE are talented. Congratulations Eladrienne and Kheph, on your absolutely beautiful build! It is truly a work of art and a work of friendship!


4 thoughts on “I think I’m out of my mind . . .

  1. Aw Newbe, thanks. You didn’t have to say that. Really. Kheph and I were hanging out at the Tower together last night. Every time we see it we are awed by it because we can’t believe we made such a beautiful build that makes others so happy.

    As for your involvement in the community, once a Caledonian, always a Caledonian. There’s absolutely nothing wrong to paying attention to the positive things going on in their real life–the one that TRULY matters.

  2. Real life should always take precedent Sir, no matter what. Second Life is the life we would have enjoyed as our reality if we could but it’s an ideal world. Your absence is of course missed but Caledon and others understand and forgive you for such. We are a very open and free society no matter the trappings of our Victorian persona. Contributing in any fashion at any level is acceptable to those of us that believe in the idea of Caledon. You do not need to feel bad about being in Real life.

    I myself, as the warmer months occur find myself in attendance with Caledon and its social circle less and less. It will survive and will accept my more regular attendance in the future.

    It is nice of you to mention the works of your friends and partners. I will have to seek out this tower for I am familiar with the works of both of its constructors and look forward to the delight of such a collaboration.

    Second Life and Caledon are a part of our lives, it is not the sum of everything we are though. You have your priorities straight sir and are on a great path of life. I doubt anyone could fault you in the least for remaining strong in your career, of improving thine own self through education, nor of the most important aspect, attending with dedication to your wife and family. Such demands and desires are what make you more of an enjoyable friend sir and for that, I respect you greatly for it.

  3. Honestly, Elle, I *did* need to say that. You and Kheph are not only very good friends, you both also share space within my shops (Writer Steam Works in the Sky and Writer Clock Works in Babbage Palisade). I know how it felt when I was told that I should seek Kheph’s products in his store in SteamSkyCity. I couldn’t help but think “ummm… you do know where the Writer in Writer Steam Works comes from, huh?”, but I let it pass. When I heard people refer to the build you two worked so hard to create as Kheph’s build without giving you credit, I felt just as bad for you.

    I know how much you worked on that project and how much it meant to you. After all, you had mentioned that the Bosch painting was one of your favorites. One can clearly see Kheph’s influence in the build, but I can also see how much of Elle is also in the build. It is the work of friendship inspired by your love of a work of art.

    Again, I congratulate you both on your wonderful work together as friends!

  4. Thank you for your very kind words, Mr Tairov!

    I miss spending as much time in-world as I once did, but don’t get me wrong. I do not feel bad about spending more time in the real world. 😎 I am merely explaining to friends why I might not be around as much. Interestingly, I have found much more time to be in world in the past little while, though not on weekends or evenings. I tend to be online first thing in the morning before work and then sporadically afterward.

    I do feel, although I might still be a citizen of Caledon, I am not so much a part of Caledon, if that makes sense. Caledon is still a part of me, though, and that is what keeps me there. The people, the friends I’ve made and the experiences I’ve shared are all a part of who I have become, both in-world and IRL.

    With weather becoming more inviting north of the border, I’m sure that I will be spending even more time IRL and less in world. That’s just a matter of reality. 2ndL is a diversion and a tool. It allows me to experience that which one cannot IRL. As for it being a tool…. I enjoy developing objects, even if people don’t enjoy buying those objects. To that end, 2ndL is the tool with which I develop. Additionally, it is a tool with which I converse with friends. 2ndL will never be a replacement for real life. That will always come first and for that I will never appologize! 😎

    As for Eladrienne’s and Kheph’s build… I hope to spend a little time there tomorrow morning and should then be able to do an article about it. Unfortunately, I am unable to get in-world at the moment, or I would post an slurl to get there.

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